Our Montana minivan is as much a barfing receptacle as our bedroom floors.  And, what may appear to be a perfectly healthy child at the start of the trip could, in fact, metamorphose into a faucet of scrambled food.  Unfortunately, there are really no ways to prevent nausea (other than to slip Gravol into their peanut butter sandwiches, but let’s not go there.)  Thankfully, there is a way to prevent the worst part of throwing up -  the clean up. 

We always pack a barf pitcher.  Known by most families as a juice pitcher.  It has come in handy several times over the past few years when one of the kids has claimed a sore tummy.  “I feel like I’m gonna barf,” is the preferred statement uttered by my kids at least once every couple of hours in the minivan.  I will reach behind the drivers’ seat and grab the pitcher.  “Use this if you need to throw up, ” I’ll calmly advise the sick one.  The precaution provides peace of mind, even if the likelihood of the complainer filling it is close to zero. 

Our past road trip through the Maritimes, I was beginning to think the pitcher was no longer a necessary item on our packing list.  No one had actually thrown up in the van in five years.  However, during the final leg of our drive out of the Maritimes and into Maine, the undulating curves of the road proved too much for our six year old. 

He warned us of his predicament and, as usual, we pass along the clean pitcher and told him to use it if necessary.  After six episodes of vomiting, the pitcher was half full and the car reeked like a bad hangover.  When he finally had emptied his insides, we pulled over the side of the road and cleaned out the container with a bottle of water and some wipes.

The clean up took less than two minutes and our car didn’t suffer a speck of vomit.  I’ll never question the value of a barf pitcher again.

In fact, spending a day strapped to a seat with abysmal lumbar support is a challenge to any human body’s tolerance for discomfort.  The act of sitting for any period of time applies more pressure on the back than any other position.  So, while strapped inside a car, any opportunity to lift the rear end off of a seat is a help.  Today’s seatbelt laws (that fortunately promote the safety and well-being of passengers) hinder us from allowing our bodies to find the positions are most comfortable for our bodies.

A lumbar support pillow is a relatively effective measure to prevent the tension that results in the lower back from sitting.  There are many brands and types of pillows on the market.  One convenient option is to purchase an inflatable pillow.  That way, each passenger’s pillow can be deflated and folded away during short drives and, depending on the size of the child, can be inflated to various pressures to suit his or her body frame. 

I recently started using an inflatable travel support pillow called Back Booster.  With some experimentation, I was able to find the most comfortable level of inflation.  When fully inflated, my upper back couldn’t rest against the top of the seat.  However, when inflated less than half its capacity, the pillow offered just enough support to mould into my lower back, thus allowing me to maintain a proper posture.  The same level of inflation turned out to fit perfectly for my six year old, as well.  His complaints stop abruptly as soon as he slips the pillow his back.    

A less effective, but easy alternative is to place a rolled towel behind the lower back.  Ideally, the driver should adjust the seat to be as straight as possible and close enough to the steering wheel to prevent leaning forward to reach the controls.  Just as important to spinal health, is to take regular breaks outside of the car.  Every few hours, pull into a rest stop for a stretch of the legs.

1. The beaches are beautiful, but the best ones are in PEI. 
2. Hotels don’t provide a good cup of coffee and the Maritimes don’t have Tim Hortons at every corner (much less Starbucks!)  If you’re a sucker for the good stuff, pack your own coffee maker and beans (or a kettle and quality instant coffee.) 
3. There is such a thing as McLobster (we didn’t try it, though.)
4. One map is never enough.  Collect as many as you can along the way.
5. When the kids’ electronic toys are banned in the car because of bad behaviour, the parents suffer most.
6. Don’t travel out east for the great weather.
7. You won’t find a guy named Mac selling seafood out of his van off the highway.  In the Maritimes, it actually comes right off the boat.
8. There is a lobster season for every province.  So, if eating lobster is a goal, find out the season dates and travel accordingly.  We missed it in Nova Scotia, but found it in Cape Breton and PEI. 
9. Sure, Maritimers are friendly, but no friendlier than anyone else in Canada.
10. Restaurant food is usually crappier than home made food, and a whole lot pricier – unless you’re ordering fresh seafood in the Maritimes.
11. Kids CAN eat hotdogs every day for two weeks and never get sick of it.
12. Quebec City really does not celebrate Canada Day!  We arrived there on July 1st and were promptly told by the hotel staff that there were no festivities.  So much for our Canada shirts.
13. The least commercial place on the planet has to be Cape Breton.  It’s the best place to embrace the beauty of nature.
14. Canada should do everything they can to protect the livelihood of their Maritime fishermen.
15. Hotels and resorts never provide cutting boards.  Pack a small one on your next road trip.
16. Whether you scream in a whisper or a loud voice (at your kids), you still get a sore throat.
17. The Maritimes isn’t about enjoying luxury accommodations, it’s about appreciating the luxury of nature.
18. Canada is a beautiful country and worth exploring.

Familiarize yourself with the three main types of carriers. 

• The cargo box – a very popular choice – is comprised of a hard shell and can cost up to $1,000.  To maximize its efficiency a set of bags that fit snugly within the compartment are available to purchase, so that no space is wasted. 
• The cargo basket is a metal basket that sits on the roof and can be filled with an array of parcels and bags.  It provides travellers a bit more flexibility than a box because items don’t have to conform to a particular shape and is similarly priced to most boxes.  The luggage can be roped in manually or held firm with netting made specifically for the basket. 
• The cargo bag is made of canvas and is collapsible when not in use, making it easy to stow away.  An added benefit is that this carrier won’t dent, or worse, become lodged should the driver accidentally enter an underground parking garage with a full load on top.  They are the most economical choice of all the carriers but are less durable. 

Consider your family’s personal needs.

• This cargo carrier may last for decades, so think about how your children’s travelling needs may evolve over the years.  Don’t base the purchase decision solely on the one major road trip the family undertakes every year.  Also think about the shorter distances driven for various reasons throughout the year such as for hockey tournaments, ski weekends, cottage stays, or camping.  Even though they are less packing-intensive than a long road trip requires, the more luggage that can be stowed on top for any length of drive, the greater the comfort for passengers inside. 
• Think about what types of activities you foresee your family enjoying as the kids grow older.  Are camping excursions in the horizon?  Skiing?  More road trips to visit the In-laws?
• Consider the pressures of every season.  Some winter sports, such as skiing, require a lot of space and families may want to buy a carrier that is long enough to fit them.  If bicycling is a cherished family outing then perhaps the carrier should be narrow enough to allow a second rack for bicycles, too.  In Canada, every season is as unpredictable as the one before and after it.  Summer days can range from blistering heat to rainstorms.  And winters can be cold and dry or a never ending tribute to the power of the shovel.  This means the Canadian roadtripper has to be prepared for every kind of driving condition, and this should also be factored into the purchasing decision (and therefore, may make the basket an impractical choice for winter driving.)   

When my husband and I decided to purchase a Thule rooftop carrier, our kids were very young.  Because the main purpose of the carrier was to accommodate our luggage during the long road trips from Toronto to Florida, we could have purchased a small cargobox for a reasonable price.  However, Ted and I planned to introduce the kids to skiing eventually and decided, therefore, to buy the longest Thule carrier available to fit the skis we hoped we would be lugging.  Last winter we drove to Ellicottville for our first ski vacation.  While the kids found plenty of reasons to squabble and complain during the drive, not one of them whined about the lack of space.  All the ski equipment was packed on top.

Rarely do these two roles intersect.  And while our “Me Tarzan, You Jane” separation of duties can be a source of strife in many aspects of a relationship, it actually works well in the context of preparing for a road trip.  For one thing, it prevents fighting.  And when a family is about to embark on a long drive together in a small, confined space, it’s not ideal to start the trip with a cloud of resentment hovering over the front seat of the car. 

Our ritual is simple.  On the date of departure (or the day before, if we’re leaving before dawn), I review my checklists and slowly build an arsenal of necessities for the trip.  I’m in the zone – gliding from drawer to cupboard to closet.  I can practically hear Snow White whistle while I work.  If Ted suddenly wanders into my zone with his comments or questions, I cringe.

“Did you pack the camera?”

“When will you be done?”

“Don’t forget the passports.  Did you print the map?”

“Please let me do this,” I’ll reply through a forced smile.  Or I’ll send him off to grab a few things for me.  Either response tends to elicit a quick withdrawal of his presence.

Generally, Ted understands why I want my solitude.  After all, he does not want me in his way when it’s time to pack the car.  If anything, his intrusions are less about a desire to help me, and more a desire to move into the next stage – filling the car.  Our established routine took years to define.  I used to load suitcases into the car, thinking I was being helpful.  Ted would then proceed to pull everything out, shaking his head with a laugh. 

“That’s not how you pack a car,” he’d chide me as I stood beside him, bewildered.

I still don’t know the secret to car packing.  Whether men trade clandestine tips about how to get the most space out of a vehicle, or they are hardwired at birth to excel at this role, I don’t know.  But I’ve learned to let him do it the way he wants.  No matter how much he curses and huffs and puffs with frustration – it’s best to not interfere.  That’s all part of the process.  And, keeping the peace is as much a goal as readying the car to leave.  Anger can take up a lot of space in small quarters, too.

But, like the throngs of modern minivan owners, the station wagon was a forced possession that parents of yesteryear felt compelled to own by sheer necessity, rather than desire.  It had, after all, a number of merits that no two-door model could ever compete with.  Although it’s hard for today’s minivan owners to imagine how an oversized buick, with a rear-facing seat instead of trunk, could provide any roadtripping luxuries, they might alter their view if they try to imagine the headspace of a parent in the 1970’s and 80’s. 

While today’s family road warriors rely on built-in video screens, hand-held electronics, and spacious interiors to assuage discomforts, families of the past had something else entirely: freedom.  Seat belts were voluntary (read: unused), kids outgrew car seats before they learned how to walk, and the only law drivers really had to obey was the speed limit.  Undoubtedly, today’s web of rules around car safety has cushioned many children from injury.  But just imagine the possibilities.

During our first couple of drives from Toronto to Florida, we had to make do with the usual passenger set up.  Two kids were stuck facing oncoming traffic in the back seat while other three of us shared the middle row (the sucker in the centre with knees crammed into his chest because of the “bump” upon which his feet had to rest.)  When we got tired of sitting upright, we’d spread out a little more.

“Just lie down,” our parents would advise us (and be quiet, they’d think).  Obediently, we’d reposition ourselves so that two bodies laid head to foot on the middle seat, one sprawled uncomfortably across the dirty carpeted floor, while in the back seat, a body laid on the cushioned seat and another on the floor (thankfully bump-free.)  When the yelling and fighting over who got stuck on the crappy floor bed got too out of hand, Mom or Dad would simply whip a hand to the back and lay a wallop on whomever was closest.  Another freedom of the times – good old fashioned kid-smacking.

One year, they came up with a splendid idea to finally end the sibling friction caused by seat preference.  All the seats behind the driver were folded down so that the entire back of the station wagon was levelled.  Then my parents pulled off a single mattress from my sister’s bed and hauled into the back of the car.  They didn’t want to hear a single complaint about a bump the entire ride to Florida.  And they didn’t.  The wagon raced along the freeways while we repositioned to our hearts’ content.  My brothers got to have wrestling matches, I got to sleep cuddled up in comfort, potato chips were served in one big bowl that we could all eat together (crumbs didn’t bother us so much in those days.)  It was a dream road trip, by any kids’ standard.  And I’m certain the cops we passed along the way – to whom we gestured with the usual peace sign – thought the same thing.  After all, it was a different time.

2. Cut strawberries – sure, there are loads of different fruits out there that you can serve the kids, but many of them will never get eaten (or get too bruised before they’re unpacked.)  These sweet bite-size snacks don’t pose a choking hazard to wee ones and, best of all, you can serve them early in the ride to assuage the guilt from feeding them junk food the rest of the way.

3. Lollipops - there’s not a good thing to say about these tooth-decaying orbs of sugar.  Except that kids LOVE them and they take a while to finish.  So, if you’re looking for five minutes of peace, you’ll be a sucker for suckers.

4. Sandwich wraps – bypass the first McDonalds you see, and instead, enjoy some homemade wraps. My personal favourite is the chicken wrap  (recipe here.)  This is less for the kids and more for the refined tastes of the adult passengers.

5. Trail mix – sorry to all the nut-allergy sufferers out there, but this is a healthy, easy snack that everyone can enjoy.

6. Peanut butter sandwiches – Kids loves these any day of the week.  They’re easy to make, stay fresh for hours, neat, and healthy. 

7. Salami and cheddar cheese – Be sure to include a sharp knife when packing this.  It’s a quick and easy snack or meal on the road.  Even better, have a hard-top cooler at hand to cut upon.

8. Cut carrots – Driving is a bit like watching TV.  You always feel like munching on something.  Rather than reach for the Doritos, leave out a bag of cut carrots.  It’s amazing that you can just as readily enjoy munching on a carrot as an all-dressed chip (well, almost).  Your waistline will thank you!

9. Granola bars – I try to stick to the healthier granola bar fare out there, but to each her own.  One of the best aspects to these snacks?  They’re easy to toss from the front to the rear seat of a minivan.  Be sure to buy a few packs.

10. One hand-picked treat for each child – Before embarking on the road trip, allow each child to select his or her own treat at the grocery store.  It gives them something to look forward to and helps relieve those periods in the car when the kids are grumpy, bored, irritable, or hungry (for something other than strawberries.)  Also, it doesn’t hurt to get your own chocolate indulgence… Life on the road can be tough on the adults, too!

The challenge in relying on one’s stellar memory is even greater with today’s constant multitasking environment.  The cell phone, laptop, and TV are all on, kids are crying for snacks or fighting over a video game – all while Mom is packing the freshly cleaned laundry between trips to the kitchen where dinner is cooking.  Despite our best efforts, however, the brain doesn’t do two things at once very well.  Never mind five things at once. 

The brain tends to treat a secondary task like a distraction from the first rather than synthesizing it into the thought process.  If Mom is packing for the baby (using her working memory to complete the task fully), and suddenly must turn her attention to her fighting kids, her working memory is distracted.  It then tries to follow the instructions for two tasks at the same time – forcing double the amount of information to be processed.  The original information (baby stuff) stored in working memory will probably be lost to make room for the current task (stop kids from killing each other.)  Next thing, she’s standing dumbfounded in the middle of her kitchen wondering what it was, exactly, she needed to do.

A list, however, will ensure (almost) everything is packed by the time the car backs out of the driveway.  After the list is created, Mom and Dad simply have to cross out each item as it’s stuffed into a bag without having to rummage through the recesses of their brains to remember small details, such as whether the charger was packed with the camera. 

Following a few tips will ensure that the list compiled is fail-proof against the most memory-challenged days:

1. Begin compiling the list at least one week before the date of departure so that items can be added as they naturally come to mind, rather than try to recount everything in a fifteen minute brainstorming session
2. Divide the list into categories, such as food, clothes, toiletries.  This will make packing simpler and the final hour “check” run smoothly.
3. Preserve the list for future trips (this is even simpler to do if it is completed electronically and printed off before each trip.)  Adjust the list according to destination, age of children, and length of car ride.
4. Separate the to-do list from the packing list, and consider starting a list of expenses – beginning with the first gas station fill-up.

1. Rice cakes – serious lingering odour.
2. Spears of broccoli and cauliflower – it may ease your guilt from letting them eat too much sugar, but these foods will not get eaten.  They will, however, get thrown.
3. Skittles – picture your kids after devouring a pack of skittles.  Now imagine them like that tethered to a car seat behind you.
4. Ice cream.
5. Dunkaroos – this is your kids’ chance to finally do that one craft you always say no to: finger painting (with chocolate dip on shiny windows!  Cool.)
6. Soup.
7. Devilled eggs – they’re healthy, delicious, and filling.  But better to suffer your husband’s gas problem than smell rotting eggs for hours on end.
8. Popcorn – these flying kernels somehow always end up all over the place (and fit perfectly inside ear canals and nasal passages.)
9. Bubble gum – yes, it’s a great way to keep their mouths busy, but it won’t stick lips together nearly as well as it sticks hair to the back of booster seats.  Ouch.
10. Prune juice – a road trip is not the time to loosen your toddler’s constipated bowels.

Photo is from freedigitalphotos.com